Stirring the bee's nest

So my grandfather finally died yesterday. I say finally because it has been long expected and his poor health and worse attitude make it more a relief than anything. That may sound cold, but it is what it is. You simply couldn't shine that penny.

I titled this post because the recent death of my grandfather (my dad's dad) has brought to the forefront the fact that my mother and grandmother are not on speaking terms. There are far too many slights and hurt feelings to sum up here, but suffice it to say my mom has been the one who was hurt for the last time and more or less cut off communication. What bothers me is that my mother is not the type to cut someone off and is the last person I would expect to not forgive and forget. That being said, its been more or less since last August that any substantive communication has happened between my mother and grandmother.

So, as the death of my grandfather was a relatively significant event for my family...even though it isn't a direct relation to my grandmother...I felt she had the right to know about it and called her to inform her of my grandfather's timely death. My grandmother called to give her condolences to my father and ended up apologizing to my mother for the things said/done that caused the rift. At the time of the phone call I was at the gym so I was not privy to the exchange. Instead, what I got when I got home was, "YOU called my mother?" in such an accusatory tone that you would have thought I called my grandmother to tattle about something in an effort to bring scorn on my mom? Then conversation ended and I was shut off?

I'm not sure what my next action is going to be because I have no interest in suffering the same fate my grandmother has with my mom, but I also have no interest in seeing my grandmother (who's 85) die without at least trying to create some sort of normalization of relations.

Good times!